There are some dates that will always remain as special in my life and today is one of those. On this day back in 1986, (which seems like just the other day), I first became a father. Yes, today is my little boy Will’s birthday.
Happy Birthday Will
As parents we always want the do the best we can for our kids. To give them better opportunities than we had, to watch them grow, to find love and happiness and to succeed at what ever it is they chose to do.
I have many fond memories of the early years with Willo. He was a happy kid and I was a very proud dad.
But somewhere in the teenage years, the relationship collapsed, as it does between many teenage boys and their fathers.
I owe a lot to Will, because it was our uneasy relationship in his teenage years that led me to seek a solution in order to mend our relationship.
I struggled to understand why my son Will was so angry toward me and so I did the only thing I could think of; I decided to try to better understand myself – and in so doing, I changed my life forever.
The tragedy of it all was that Will never knew this, and I’ve never had an opportunity to talk to him since.
I started my journey in secret, because I had no confidence that I could discuss my emotions with my then wife. As I struggled to discover myself, at the same time I tried to introduce Will to my journey by sharing some of the personal development material I was introduced to. He rejected it and his mother proclaimed that it was all American crap (this confirmed to me that I was right not to confide in her.)
When I decided to do some artwork for relaxation, the first thing I did was paint a portrait of my boy Will. I didn't know it at the time but subconsiously I was trying to reconnect with him in my own way.
Ten months later my wife of 20 years, declared that she wanted me out of her life and we separated. She justified this by claiming that our kids didn’t want me around and she vowed to me that she would do everything in her power to make sure that I had no relationship with my children. She encouraged Will to change his surname to her maiden name.
But we are father and son. We share the same heritage; we have the same spiritual connection.
Will, if you are reading this; I want you to know that if you were with me today, I’d give you a big man hug and say Happy Birthday. You are my son, and I will always be here for you.
No matter what path you choose to tread, I’ll always be as proud of you today as I was the day you were born; because I am your father and that is all the bond I need.
I look forward to the day you finally decide to put aside your anger, settle your daemons and finally open your heart to accept all the world has to offer.
Where ever you are, all the very best on your birthday son.
Love dad.